Code of a Ranger
by halfmyheart
Summary: There are some things that every ranger should know....
1. Chapter 1

I don't own them, yada yada...

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The house was dark when Kimberly got home from work Friday evening; the only light shining through the windows came from her husband's study.

_What on earth is he doing home this time of day,_ she though as she slid her key into the front door. _He's usually still working._

Sighing, she left her keys on the kitchen counter and her small bag of groceries by the refrigerator as she made her way to Tommy's study.

"Tommy," she asked as she quietly knocked on the door.

No answer.

She gave the door a light push and it opened enough for her to stick her head though. She smiled and pushed the door completely open to reveal Tommy leaned over his desk, pen in hand, fast asleep. A small laugh escaped her at the disheveled sight of Tommy and his desk. Or at least she thought it was his desk, she couldn't really tell through the mountains of papers and coffee cups. Most of the papers were student's term papers but there was one, the one that her lovely husband just happened to be drooling on, that caught her attention. She cautiously lifted his head and peeled the paper off his face.

_Nice, _she thought as the paper left behind inked words on his skin. Putting her hand to her mouth to stifle a laugh, she began to read the heading.

Rangers Code of Practice: Rules to Live By 

1. If you have no idea what the smart guy is saying, just smile and nod your head. Things will be far less awkward if you play along. (I speak from experience…sorry Billy)

2. There is_ always _another option, just because you don't want to do it, doesn't mean it isn't there.

3. It says 'do not touch' for a reason.

4. If you have a phobia it is best to keep it to yourself, otherwise you will be taunted mercilessly by your peers. (No Conner, you don't have to go swinging with Ethan)

5. If you see a rabid fangirl, run like hell. (Just ask Andros and TJ. Which bring up another point, if you are forced to reveal your identify, it is always a good a idea to pick up a change of address form in the process.)

Kim smiled as she read through the short list and wondered briefly if number six was written on Tommy's face because it had been smudge off the paper.

"Huh, what," asked Tommy, groggily sitting up. "Oh hey. When did you get home?"

"About fifteen minuets ago," she said, trying to read number six off of Tommy's cheek. "What's this all about," she asked handing him the paper and trying not to laugh.

"Oh, right, that. Well all the younger rangers are always asking me for advice, so I decided to compile a list of things, course I was never actually gonna do anything with it," he said rubbing his face.

"Right…"

"Kim, is there something on my face, it feels funny?"

"You mean besides spit? No, nothing." Kim turned around and headed for the kitchen before she lost it completely, "so umm, what do you want for supper?"

"Whatever," said Tommy rummaging through a tower of papers."

_Typical male answer!_ "Ok, chicken it is then."

"K, are you sure there's nothing on my face?"

Kim smiled as she stared at the inky black streaks that resembled words on his cheek before crossing to the door," no, honey, your face is fine." With that, she closed the door and double over with silent laughter.

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A/N Ok, so I'm not sure if I'll continue this list...er...story or not. It depends on the reaction I get and if anyone else has any ideas for rules...But, if not, enjoy this oneshot anyway. ;) 


	2. Chapter 2

"Tommy," shouted Kimberly for the last time, her patience finally at an end. Placing the oven mitt on the counter she stalked off in the direction of Tommy's study.

"Dinner is getting cold," she said as pushed the door open.

Tommy nodded but never looked up, his hand flew across the paper, leaving behind a shiny black ink trail that Kimberly was sure was of some fascinating new rule that her lovely husband had thought up.

"I'll be there in a minute," he said.

Kim sighed. "You said that twenty minuets ago."

"Ok, ok. I'm coming." Tommy dotted his I's and crossed his T's before standing and running a hand through his hair. "Hey Kim, will you read this while I go wash up?"

"Sure," she said as he walked by, then as an after thought, "wash that spit off your face too."

She sat at his desk and took a deep breath, _here goes nothing_. Picking up the paper she began to read where she had left off.

7. When going on a secret mission with the other red rangers, make sure you have a place to hide for a few days when the girls find out.

8. **Always **make sure you carry an extra alarm for the mega ship, otherwise you might forget where you parked it. (The other rangers may make fun of you for this, but at least you won't have to listen to your girlfriend nag when you forget where the ship is.)

9. No, you don't need a license to drive a zord, but that doesn't mean they are big toys. (Justin!)

10. Time travel is a definite no-no unless accompanied by a professional. (Sorry Wes, but you still don't get a fan club for this.)

11. No, you cannot kill a fellow ranger no matter how much they annoy you. (Kira put the baseball bat down and step away from Conner!)

12. Stop making fun of the older rangers, you **will **regret it.

13. Plan A never works, plan B rarely works, plan C is almost always your best bet.

14. "What's the worst that could happen" and "It can't get any worse" are two phrases that are never to be uttered.

15. Make someone smile; buy them a stick of butter for Christmas.

16. Red and pink are two colors that work really well together, as do red and yellow… (Do with that what you will….) innocent whistle

17. If at first you don't succeed, run like hell.

18. Newbie's should **always **listen to their elders; we know what we are talking about when we tell you **not **to do something.

19. Note to self: learn to land on your feet.

20. If it looks like a dog and barks like a dog, chances are it's an evil monster trying to kill you.

Kimberly laughed as she put the paper on Tommy's desk and went back to the kitchen. _Where on earth does he come up with some of those?_

As she reheated Tommy's plate in the microwave she wondered briefly if she could contribute anything to his list.

_I bet Billy could, _she thought, but suddenly a sharp voice cut across her thoughts.

"Kimberly!"

She poked her head around the corner to see Tommy leaning out of the bathroom doorway, his hand violently scrubbing the side of his face with a white washcloth.

"You lied to me," he said calmly.

Kim put on an innocent smile, "Honey, there is nothing on your face," she said as he attempted to scrub the skin from his face, but her innocent smile suddenly turned to one of amusement as he let the washcloth drop.

Tommy scowled, "no, now there isn't."

"Umm, actually Tommy, you might want to look again," said Kim staring at the prominent black smear marks on his cheek.

Tommy shot her a murderous glare before turning to look at his reflection in the mirror and he groaned aloud as he realized that the pen he had been writing with wasn't a pen at all, but a permanent marker.

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A/N You know you want to push that little 'go' button and make me smile. Comments, critizism, and suggestions are apprieciated. A big thanks to eveyone who gave a rule, I tried to use them all...some may be changed just a bit, but they were all great. Keep 'em coming. ) 


	3. Chapter 3

Kimberly hated Monday mornings with its jammed freeways and insane drivers battling it out over who drove in which lane. The honking horns, standstills, and obscene gestures that she saw flying all over the place were enough to actually make her happy to get to work; at least there she didn't have to worry about being run over by some idiot putting on her makeup during the morning rush hour.

Sighing as she spotted her overflowing inbox, she sank into her chair and took a small drink of her lukewarm coffee.

"I hate Mondays," she confided to her blank computer screen, then she was struck by a sudden thought. Her meeting wasn't until noon, she had all afternoon to do the paperwork, and she had been meaning to add a few of her own rules to Tommy's list……

21. When approaching and evil villain, make sure that your backup will actually back you up. (It was only once! – Billy)

22. Think before you act. There is a** very** fine line between heroic and stupid.

23. Always think to ask the new red ranger from outer space if he has someone lying around in a cyro chamber.

24. Don't poke people and say 'you're human!' It just annoys them. (Have you ever seen Andros annoyed? Not a pretty sight.)

25. Never, EVER, mess with a pink ranger and her hair. (Two words: Death wish!)

26. Never dis the tech guy; you never know when he might save your life. (Just ask Cam.)

27. Witty comebacks are an absolute must for a red ranger, but you must let the others get a few in occasionally, keeps team moral at a good level.

28. Evil rangers rarely stay that way… (How could you **not** know that by now?)

29. Who says fan clubs are a good thing? They're full of obsessed psychos who make you yearn for baddies you use to fight. (Cheer up Wes!)

30. Its not called hero worship, its call being a stalker. (Quit it! You're really starting to freak Tommy out.)

31. The dumbest, most harmless looking monster will be the one who comes the closest to killing you.

32. If somebody yells 'look out' it's already too late.

33. "Another One Bites the Dust" is **not** our theme song! (Stop it Jason!)

34. Don't tease the brainiacs, they are **way smarter** than you are and payback **will** be hell.

35. No, you cannot use the force! (Who do you think you are? Obi-wan Kenobi?)

36. Guys, you may outnumber the females on your team, but you will **never** win!

37. There will always be a love connection between two people on a ranger team. Some of you just don't know how to do anything about it. coughColeAlyssacough

38. If a ranger laughs kinda like this 'Muahahahahhahaha' assume they are evil and are going to try and kill you. (Right Tommy?)

39. Teleporting is a privilege not a right. We **will** make you walk if necessary.

40. After blowing up a monster, don't bother to celebrate…the bad guys almost always make it grow. (And please keep your victory dances to yourselves, nobody really want to see that!)

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A/N There were so many great suggestions to chose from, keep 'em coming! Now, you know you want to press that little purple button and make me smile. 


	4. Chapter 4

Tommy could not believe his luck. Obviously, it wasn't bad enough that he had to walk around a school full of teenagers all day with permanent marker smeared across his cheek because as soon as he entered his classroom he found himself face to face with Devin's camera.

"So tell us Dr. O, what's on your face? Is it some sort of inexplicable paleontology symbol, or were you just involved in some sort of freak accident that has mysteriously scarred you for life? Enquiring minds need to know."

Tommy glowered at Cassidy, but she didn't back down. She stood between him and his desk, that big grin on her face, already savoring the sweet taste of victory with the inside scoop.

"Cut the camera off and take your seats please, we have a lot to do today," he said with a hint of steel in his voice.

Cassidy's smile vanished as she dropped obediently into her seat, "You heard him Devin," she whispered fiercely out of the corner of her mouth.

Tommy turned to the black board to write the day's assignment and caught sight of Conner, Kira, and Ethan snickering into their hands at the back of the class. _Kimberly must have already told them what happened! I swear that woman is gossip central around here! _

Taking a deep breath, he turned to face the class once more. _It's going to be a long day._

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Tommy sat at his desk savoring the sound of silence mingled with the soft scratching of pencils on paper. He loved pop quizzes on days like this; especially today as it gave him time to add to his ever growing list of rules.

41. Once in a while there are always civilians who are **constantly** trying to find out your identities, just distract them with a 50 shopping spree. (It usually works with Cassidy)

42. Girls make sure to let the guys think they're in charge...it boosts their egos... (Not that they **need** to be any bigger)

43. Rangers don't wear spandex; it just looks like we do! (Seriously, stop making fun of us!)

44. You do **NOT**, and I repeat, you do **NOT **get theme songs! ("Can't Touch This" is forthwith banned from all of your CD players!)

45. "It seemed like a good idea at the time" is not a valid argument.

46. Be nice to the smart guys on the team, they can make it look like an accident.

47. When a giant robot T-Rex is chasing you, locking the door to your jeep isn't gonna save your ass. (Right Tommy?)

48. During your Ranger career, expect one of these will happen to you: either you will be (a), sent to a different planet, (b), sent to a different time period, or (c), sent to another dimension.

49. Thunder and Lightning are not play toys (Hunter, Blake!)

50. Never go on a date with your best friend's sister/brother (Zhane you should know better by now. Really, it's a disaster waiting to happen. Don't. Do. It.)

51. If someone yells "DUCK", they don't mean a yellow feathered bird that quacks.

52. Motocross **IS** better than Skateboarding (Get over it Shane)

53. If your electronic device gets a virus, assume that it may be evil and will try and kill you.

54. Just because you get a cape on your uniform, it doesn't mean that you have to act like superman! (Chip! Stop! You're embarrassing us!)

55. Do **not **use your teammates as 'monster bait'. (It's not funny, especially when you get the hospital bill back.)

56. Just because they're an air-head, it doesn't mean they aren't really smart. (Right Dustin?)

57. The guy with the glasses is normally the one you really, really don't want to mess with, remember, geeks will inherit the earth. (Just ask Billy.)

58. Most, but not all of the time, the pink Ranger is the hottest female on the team. (Pinky, get used to the guys on the team looking at your spandexed rear...it's not like you never looked at the guys while they were morphed).

59. **NEVER, EVER** just assume something about a fellow ranger or monster…you do know what assuming will do to you right? (If not, break the word down into three comprehensible parts….)

60.** Stop** stalking the older rangers! (It's creepy and annoying. Do you really want to have to pay for their therapy bills Cole?)

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Tommy was brought out of his musings as the bell signaling the end of class rang through the room.

"Turn in your quizzes and don't forget to copy the homework down," he said as he stashed the list safely away in his bag.

"Hey Dr. O, this came for you yesterday. Hayley told me to give it you," said Kira handed him a large manila envelope.

"Thanks."

"Umm, Dr. O, have you even tried to get that stuff off of your face?"

Tommy glance up at the smirk on Ethan's face before deciding that the blue ranger was in need of a martial arts training session with him later that afternoon.

"Actually I have. I've tried everything. Rubbing alcohol, milk…

"Milk?"

"I read it somewhere on the internet…"

Conner managed a smirk that surpassed the one plastered on Ethan's face, yep, Tommy was gonna have to teach them a thing or two about teasing the teacher…hey that was another rule, never tease someone who can kick your ass…

"Well, I'm sure it will wear off in a couple of days," said Kira sensing the coming storm.

"Yeah," said Conner as he wandered nonchalantly out the door, "if you make it that long, I mean, high school kids can be **so** cruel."

Tommy glowered at his retreating back, that smug attitude would be the first thing to go.

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A/N You know what I want...see that little button? I hear it calling your name...keep up the awesome suggestions. 

Also, I'm thinking of making 100 rules or so. What do you guys think? Yes, no, worth reading, what?


	5. Chapter 5

Tommy laughed as he opened the envelope Kira had given him earlier that day at school. He laid the three pieces of paper, each with a different handwriting, onto his desk and shook his head. Each sheet of paper contained a list of rules written by three of his former comrades in arms. Tommy picked up the first sheet and read through the small note attached to the top.

_Tommy,_

_Kimberly said that you were compiling a list of things to do, and not to do, as a power ranger. As strange as I find this I could no help but be draw into in and soon found myself contributing to your list. I hope that you find these rules helpful in your quest to save the newer generations from the misfortune that we suffered as we started out on our journey. _

_Billy_

_P.S. Jason and Katherine wrote the last two pages, I take NO credit there._

Smiling Tommy removed the note and began to read the rules that his friends had sent him.

61. Be nice to the technicians for your team. More often then not they hold the keys to your zords and your life.

62. Red rangers stop playing the "reluctant rookie" you know you want to be a power ranger more than anyone else on your team.

63. Yes we all know the dangers, but could you not put safety locks on blasters!

64. Just because you** think** all that posing looks cool doesn't mean it actually is...

65. Yes the pretty Evil Space Ninja tricked you, but that does not mean you shouldn't give up! (Cheer up Dustin! I saw the look Marah was giving you -Winks-)

66. When you appoint a new blue ranger, make sure that he knows what he's doing! (And please stop teasing Rocky!)

67. Smile, it makes people wonder what you are up too.

68. Newbie rangers have to wash **All** of the zords. (Yes, we realize they are gigantic. No, we really don't care.)

69. If it can go wrong it will go wrong. (Make sure you have a plan b, not just plan a recycled. See rule 13 for more info.)

70. Jocks, be nice to the geeks, they are the ones who help you with school, mess with them and that five page term paper goes 'poof!' gone.

71. It's okay to hide behind the camera, it got a certain Red Ranger to notice you. (Cheer up Maddie!)

72. Always make sure your disguise is fool proof when you go to Onyx, hiding your morpher is the first step (Andros)

73. Because you're the genius, it gives you the right to be the sarcastic and/or confusing one. (Cam!)

74. Just because you have the power of invisibility, it does** not** give you the right to eavesdrop on other peoples conversations! (Tommy!)

75. Stop arguing about sports! (I don't care if motocross is better than skate boarding or if soccer is better than football!)

76. If a group of mutated turtle's shows up when you're getting your butts kicked, do not assume it was only a coincidence.

77. Don't put pictures of yourself morphed in your diary and leave it lying around. People will steal it and read it. (Cassie! The whole idea of a secret identity is to keep it a **SECRET**!)

78. Super computers are not for playing games on. (Shane!)

79. 'No, my powers can only be use for good' is not a phrase you should use lightly. (It will come back to bite you in the ass.)

80. If there's six of you, and only five powers, Russian roulette is not the solution.

"Tommy!"

Tommy glanced up from the list to see Kimberly standing in the doorway of his study. "Yeah?"

"Conner and Ethan are here to see you."

"I'll be out in a minuet."

Kimberly smiled at her husband, "so should I tell them to come back in a few hours?"

Tommy scowled. "No, I'm coming now." He added his friend's lists to the ever growing pile on his desk, noticing for the first time that Kimberly had added her own list. Sighing, he stood and crossed to the doorway.

"Tell them to meet me downstairs," he called as Kimberly disappeared around the corner. "This should be interesting…"


	6. Chapter 6

Kim appeared in the living room carrying an ice pack and a glass of water. A mischievous smile sprang to her lips at the sight of Tommy lying on the couch with his students crowded over him.

"I'm really sorry Dr. O." She heard Conner say for the millionth time since what was now being termed "The Conner Incident."

She pushed through the huddled mass and handed the ice pack to Tommy who placed it gingerly on his head. She slowly back away, out of his reach before deciding to tease him a bit.

"You're getting slow Oliver," she said with a smirk.

Tommy lifted the pack from his head to glare at her, "Conner just got lucky."

"Twice?"

Kim was beginning to think that his glare had frozen on his face; of course it would go so nicely with that marker, which she was sure would never come off, that she was shocked when he actually smiled.

"Just goes to show how good a teacher I am, that's all."

Kira rolled her eyes and turned to Conner," how hard did you hit him with that stick?"

"Harder than I thought…"

"No, really. I'm not getting slow, I've just taught you how to fight like a real man…"

"Waaay harder than you thought," said Ethan.

"Ok, I think you guys should go home and let Tommy rest," Kimberly suggested as Tommy went into full blown rant mode.

"Yeah, see ya later Dr. O."

Kimberly waited until she heard the door close behind them to slip away to Tommy's study.

"Wow," she whispered as she turned on the light, "maybe I should take him to have his head examined. He might need stitches…"

She moved a pile of papers around on his desk, searching for his car keys, when a familiar handwriting caught her eye.

"Hmmm…a list from Jason…this I've got to read…"

81. Never ask us why we always start our battles unmorphed or fight with our bare hands first before combining our weapons. That's just the way it is, OK!

82. Unless you're the Red Ranger, you can stop fantasizing about getting unique weapons/gadgets, unless your color is a variant shade of Red. (And no, that does **NOT** include Pink.)

83. If you don't like your Ranger color, too bad. Just be glad the suits don't have underwear on the outside.

84. When blasted into the air, find something more creative to say than "WHOA!"

85. Be nice to the newbie's, chances are they'll end up as your leader. (But by all means make them polish things)

86. **Stop** traveling through time! Do you know how much trouble this causes? (I know most of us have done it at least once, but believe me it's only fun the first time! But if you insist on doing it anyway, do not eat lunch first…)

87. Sky, your theme is not "Bringing sexy back", stop listening to music whilst on the beat now that you are red ranger.

88. If your teammate is captured and brainwashed, do **not **demorph in the middle of enemy territory. (Ahem, Jason…)

89. Ignore the big blue dog, he'll fight with you then erase your memory afterwards... Did that big blue dog just talk?

90. Okay, stop dancing around each other! You both like each other, everyone around you knows you like each other. Enough! Wes ask Jen out or we will do it for you! How does being locked in a supply closet sound?

91. Every team has a brooding one, goofy one, genius, tough guy, at least one girl, sometimes two girls, drowning in testosterone, and very rarely, siblings.

92. Running does **NOT** make you a coward; sometimes it makes you the smartest person on your team. (Ha! Take that Billy!)

93. If you have a bad memory, ask the tech guy to build something to help you record what you need to do that day…assuming you remember to use it.

94. If your invention causes you to switch bodies with a Ranger of the opposite sex, make sure any blabbermouths on the team don't know about it, or you'll never hear the end of it.

95. Male rangers if you piss a female ranger off...it was nice knowing you. (Who would be that stupid anyway?)

96. When on a Red Ranger mission, if one of the older ones says something cool to the villains, make sure you either say something just as cool, or keep your mouth shut, rookie.

97. We have doors for a reason… (No they aren't to slam people's faces into Adam.)

98. Never get involved in a 'who's the better red colored ranger' fight with your team mate (Hunter & Shane!)

99. If your 'dead fiancée' shows up one day out of the blue, don't just assume it's a coincidence.

100. Yes opposites attract, but you don't want them colliding and one killing the other. (Vida go back to the turn tables but give Xander his head back!)

Kimberly's reading was cut short as a moan from the living room brought her back to reality. She snatched up Tommy's keys and ran off in search of her jacket. As an afterthought, she also snatched up Kat's list; she wasn't going to spend all night at the hospital with nothing to read.

"Get side tracked," asked Tommy from the front door.

"Kinda, come on let's get your head seen about, although as hard as your head can be sometimes I seriously doubt Conner did too much damage."

"Ha ha," said Tommy dryly, sliding into the passenger seat, "you're just a barrel of laughs tonight."

Kim snapped the seat belt in place and put the car in reverse. "At least one of us still has a sense of humor."

Tommy hunched down in the seat to prevent car lights from shining directly thought the windshield into his eyes, "Kim, what am I going to tell the doctor when he asks me what happened?"

Kim laughed but didn't answer. "Kim?"

"Tell 'em you fell face first down the stairs, he'll never know the difference."

"That's a bit cliché isn't it?"

"Well do you really want to tell him that you got your ass handed to you by a teenager?"

Tommy paled and hunched lower into the seat, "well when you say it like that of course it's going to sound bad!"


	7. Chapter 7

It was midnight when Kimberly finally finished all the paperwork for the hospital and sat down in a chair by the window. She sighed as she looked through the glass at the dismal weather, it had started to rain when they took Tommy back for x-rays and she was not looking forward to driving home in the icy downpour. Looking around to make sure no one was watching, she took out Kat's list and started to read.

101. Okay, leave Adam alone, his spirit animal could've been a lot worse, like a llama. Besides, some frogs eat beetles if you know what I mean.

102. A cocky ranger will normally be put into their place...

103. The phrase 'Do you believe in magic?' is only cool once. Let's keep it that way. (Nick!)

104. Always remember, the guy that's training you, he's been there, done that, he's not impressed by your showing off (ring any bells Red Rangers?)

105. The new guy (or guys) in town are usually the evil rangers, even if they are nice (Especially if they are nice…)

106. If you get caught spying on your teammate, just walk away and whistle innocently like nothing happened. (It worked for Lucas.)

107. If you're from a different country than America, make sure you use every single stereotype you can think of about your country, just to confuse the heck out of the others (Kat, Xander)

108. Yellow does occasionally look okay on a guy (Chip….)

109. Never make fun of anybody's size...it will be your downfall!

110. Does it really surprise you that we're a TV show?

111. All Rangers should at least try to keep relationships within the group, it's a lot less explaining when you have to dash off during an attack than coming back to a pissed off date. (Zack knows all about this one.)

112. "I didn't know she was your sister," is not a valid excuse Zhane!

113. You shouldn't mock your fellow teammates, especially after you have been caught eavesdropping. They will hurt you when they finally catch you. (Yeah, you have to sleep sometime Katie, Trip.)

114. Don't refuse to watch Japanese TV shows because you think they are making fun of you, they **aren't**; besides they are an excellent way to pass your history class. (Just ask Conner, he got a B on his paper.)

115. Its never a good idea to tell the bad guys that you want to be evil again, chances are you will get your wish.

116. If you **HAVE** to pass your powers onto someone, make sure it's not some annoying little kid, no matter **HOW** smart he is.

117. Yes, you can pull the sword out of the stone.** No**, it does** not** make you king!

118. If a big bird is flying around, chances are it'll attack you. No, it is not the one from Sesame Street!

119. Liking a fellow ranger of the same gender is okay; just make sure he/she isn't taken first.

120. Yes, Tommy's Native American, but no, his "Ut, seet, aiyaa!" is **NOT** some Native American phrase or secret code.

Kim's laughter drew the unwanted attention of an elderly couple sitting next to her.

"Excuse me, but what's so funny," asked the little old man.

"Just a letter my friend sent me," she said as she folded up the paper and put it safely back in her purse.

"Kim?"

She looked up to see Tommy standing dejectedly before her. There was a huge bandage wrapped around his head and he was holding a small bottle of pain killers.

"Can we please go now? You know how much I hate hospitals, and** they** aren't helping."

Kim followed his gaze to the door where Conner and Kira stood.

"We just wanted to make sure you were ok," said Kira elbowing Conner in the ribs and preventing him from speaking.

"Yeah, we just…what she said," he mumbled, rubbing his side.

Tommy rolled his eyes and grabbed Kimberly's arm. "Let's go."

--- --- ---

The next day Tommy strolled as casually as he could into his classroom, a huge bandage covering the twelve stitches above his eye and the marker standing out vividly against his pale skin.

"Dr. O," said Cassidy happily.

Tommy walked right past her, "No, Cassidy. Sit down right now." He turned to face her partner in crime. "And Devin…"

Devin's hand shot to the off button on his camera before his teacher had even finished his sentence, "it's off Dr. O, I swear!"

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Now it's your turn...remember to review...and suggest, suggestions are always good... 


	8. Chapter 8

Kimberly heard the front door slam but thought nothing of it until she heard angry voices coming from the lair. She set down her novel and went to investigate. As she neared the bottom stair she recognized two of the voices as belonging to Conner and Ethan.

"Give it back," she head Ethan yell at the jock.

There was a heavy thud and a shriek from the blue ranger as Conner started laughing.

"Conner," said Ethan with his trademark whine. "You broke it!"

"Uh, no I didn't…"

"Are you really surprised Ethan? I mean you can't let Conner hold anything unless you want it broken…or seriously maimed."

"Hey! Stop it, it was an accident alright," said Conner defensively. "Besides, they said Dr. O was gonna be fine. You want even be able to see the scar when he gets the stitches out!"

"Yeah, but it's kinda the fact that he had to have them in the first place," said Trent from the corner of the room.

Conner threw the artist a death glare but soon turned his attention back to Ethan. "Don't worry dude, I'm sure you can fix it by tomorrow, I mean that's what you genius's do. Fix stuff"

Ethan snorted. "I'm going to take that as a complement and not as the insult you meant it to be."

"Whatever dude," said Conner rolling his eyes.

"Hey, check this out you guys."

Trent was standing at the computer staring at a folder full of papers.

"What is it?"

"I don't know it looks said Conner, "just what we need."

"No, you have to read these, they are hilarious! They are rules for the power rangers…you don't think Dr. O is gonna make us follow them do you? Guys?"

Kimberly smiled as she watched the young rangers reading through Tommy's list.

"Hey, "she said walking into the room.

"Hey," said Kira. "Have you read this? It's so funny."

"Yeah…"

"Oh I have a great idea. Why don't we help Dr. O out and give him some more rules?"

"You know, I think that's a great idea," said Kimberly. "You can add some from that list there." She pointed to another manila envelope that had not been opened yet. "They are from some of the old gang, but feel free to add some of your own rules too."

Conner smirked at his fellow teammates, "this is gonna be fun."

121. So what if she's a big pop star diva? You have the real talent! (Cheer up Kira, you'll make it!)

122. When making a SECRET video about your life as a power ranger please make sure you put it AWAY after you finish editing it. (Right Tommy?)

123. Its not the fall that kills you it's whoever lands on top of you.

124. Ethan, give Conner his soccer ball back, he's beginning to freak out.

125. Note: Although the term "You break it you bought it" does not apply when in a giant robot battle, try to destroy as little public property as you can, taxes are high enough already!

126. Ok, green may not be the best color, but at least I have a blaster and less responsibility.

127. His dumbass, girl chasing bravado is really a cover-up; yes he really likes you if you'd give him a chance. (Kira and Conner!)

128. I am not Luke and you are not my father! (You people just think you're so funny don't you?)

129. If you're really curious about how big the fan base is, check out fanfiction sites. (-Innocent whistle-)

130. Do not argue with your talking, enchanted saber during a zord battle. You'll just get your ass kicked.

131. If you're undercover at a villains' meeting, just drink the damn lava juice! (Andros!)

132. "Kamehameha" and "Big Bang Attack" are not phrases to be use when firing a blaster! (Anime marathons are now banned before battles!)

133. Do **NOT** give Conner shiny objects, he's distracted enough already!

134. Don't be rude to the Ninjetti master with the "Mighty Mouse" voice, especially when you need new powers.

135. Make sure to ask your mentor if there's someone even stronger than the current villain you're fighting on their way (thanks for no warning about Zedd, Zordon!)

136. We are not wimps, but if we have flu we reserve the right to sleep for a few days.

137. Don't play with your trading cards at school, chances are the evil principle will confiscate them and use them against you! (ETHAN!)

138. The answer to an arrogant green ranger is not "sick 'em Cujo!" (Joel had to have thirty stitches in his leg…)

139. If the monsters are suddenly good and the Power Rangers are evil then you've just landed into your own personal Alternate Universe! (Tori...)

140. Rare and exotic plants do not make good gifts, especially when the bad guys get their hands on them… (Kimberly still doesn't like to talk about 'the plant episode' from high school.)

Kimberly looked up from her novel in time to see Conner throw his soccer ball at Ethan, "I'm not that easily distracted!"

"Are too!"

"Am not." Conner picked up the ball and threw it at Trent as he joined Ethan's side, but Trent ducked and the ball flew through the door and hit Tommy in the face as he rounded the corner.

"Uh…sorry Dr. O. I…."

"Conner, get out of my house, and don't come back for a very long time."

"Actually, we were just leaving anyway…"

Tommy shook his head, "good."

Picking up his ball from the floor at Tommy's feet Conner hurried after the retreating backs of his friends.

Kimberly put her book in front of her face to keep her smile hidden, but Tommy knew she was laughing at him.

"It's no funny," he said as he picked up the paper his students had just been pouring over. "Conner is a menace to society."

"No, you're just an accident waiting for a place to happen," said Kimberly without looking up from her reading.

Tommy sat in the computer chair and glared at her. "Well, at least I don't faint every time something spectacular happens."

Kim playfully threw her book at him, "I haven't fainted in years Oliver!"

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Reviews are love! 


	9. Chapter 9

"Please, remind me again why we are here," said Kira quietly out the corner of her mouth.

Conner stopped crawling momentarily and turned to face the yellow ranger, "because I want to make sure that Dr. O is ok, and that he isn't planning on assassinating me for revenge."

Kira snorted at the look on Conner's face. "Yeah right, Dr. O wouldn't do anything to compromise his teaching position. Besides, he's not the revengeful you-hit-me-in-the-face-with-a-toy-soccer-ball-so-I'm-gonna-beat-you-up type. He'll cool off in a day or so, and if he doesn't…" she shrugged, "well you know what they say, revenge is a desert best served cold."

Conner's mouth dropped open. "Are you serious?"

"Well, if he does catch us…um, you, lurking around his house at 2 am, all he'll do is throw you out. You'renotworthhisgettingintroubleover."

"What did you say?"

Kira stood as she walked cautiously into the lair, her flashlight held out in front of her, "never mind."

Conner followed her up to the desk and looked around for any sign that his mentor was awake and lurking in the shadows.

"You know what. I'm beginning to think that this was a bad idea," he said in a whisper.

"Why are you whispering," asked Kira as she brushed dirt off the front of her jeans. "No, Conner," she grabbed his arm as the red ranger hurriedly made for the door. "You did not have me crawling around in the forest with the bugs, and break into my science teacher's house at 3 am to chicken out on me. No, you go upstairs and make sure that Dr. O is ok."

Conner looked Kira straight in the eye, "no, this was a bad idea. Let's just read the list and go. We can make sure that he isn't permanently disfigured tomorrow at school, besides you heard what he told me earlier about not coming back, it he catches me here…."

Kira rolled her eyes as she picked up Tommy's rapidly growing list. "Fine Conner, but next time you decide to go traipsing through the forest, you can go alone."

141. Its not your fault that you were turning into a bug, just say the after effects of time travel threw you off, it's believable. (Cam!)

142. If someone on your team has been in the Air Force **DO NOT PISS HER OFF**!! There's probably three different ways she could stun your ass before you knew what was going on.

143. Ethan quit tapping into NASA's satellite system; they **can** trace it back to you no matter how careful you are.

144. An example to learn from...being put under any spell...can bring out a side of you that really** wasn't** mean for everyone to see! (-Innocent Smile- Billy's underwear….)

145. **Stop** making Wizard of Oz references about Zordon. (There are no curtains in the command center Justin!)

146. There's nothing wrong with teaching generations of children to put a mask on, run around in spandex and attack ugly people! **Is there?**

147. Stop with the innocent whistling, bushes **do not** whistle!

148. Yes Trent, you are the white ranger. But there's **never** gonna be a 'Forever White' mission.

149. The word is **TEAMWORK**, not ten copies of myself. (Repeat after me, "There is not I in team")

150. If you give us a bad name, we **WILL** go off into space and leave you behind. (…wonder who that could be…)

151. Xander quit playing "Pink" by Aerosmith, Vida's eye is starting to do that twitching thing.

152. Just because you do spend an **inordinate** amount of time at someone's house, that does not give you permission to leave your car there... (CONNER!)

153. Do **NOT** let Shane have sugar; he's like Twitchy after having coffee.

154. Being baked into a pizza doesn't get you a fan club. (Sorry TJ)

155. Just because you are a power ranger doesn't mean you can wear your color all the time...someone's bound to notice color coded kids that disappear when the rangers show up.

156. Stop sticking your gum under the seats on the zords. (It's disgusting and the techs **hate** cleaning it up!)

157. The Lair is **not** the Batcave Conner, stop referring to it as such. (It's not funny! - Tommy)

158. If the planet has a force field around it, it's probably** not** a place you want to visit. (Andros…TJ does occasionally know what he's talking about.)

159. When someone makes a mistake do **not** tell them that the village called and they want their idiot back. (It's mean people! You'll make them cry!)

160. You had better make **damn sure** that monster is destroyed before you walk off; chances are its just playing dead. (You will regret it later!)

Conner suppressed a grin at the mention of his name.

"You see that Kira, I made this list quite a few rimes. I'm gonna be famous one day."

Kira couldn't help bursting the red rangers bubble, "yeah, too bad none of it is good stuff about you…"

Conner shot her a death glare and was about to reply when the overhead lights suddenly switched on.

"Conner," said a cold voice from the doorway.

Slowly, Conner placed the list back on the desk and turned to face Dr. O.

"We were just leaving," he said noting that his teacher, wearing only black jogging pants, was blocking the only exit.

Tommy faced his students torn between burning their ears for being at his house at such an ungodly hour and just throwing them out and failing them. Both would be equally satisfying.

"Conner, what did I say earlier?"

"To leave and not come back for a very long time."

"Then why are you back? And at 3 am no less?"

Conner gulped and looked to Kira for help. "Well we were just…"

Tommy moved aside and motioned towards the door. "Leave, and I mean it Conner, unless the world is coming to an end or you are dying I don't want to see you at my house for at least three weeks. Do I make myself perfectly clear?"

"Yes sir," said Conner edging past him out the door and using Kira as a shield.

"Good. Just remember that you have a test on Friday…I'd hate to see you flunk it…." He let the threat hang heavy in the air as his students hurried up the stairs and disappeared into the darkness above.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N Just so we are all clear: There were no animals harmed in the making of this fic.

* * *

"Good Luck," said Trent reaching up to take Kira's empty water bottle before her first act. 

"Thanks," she said, flashing him a killer smile.

Trent nodded, then turned and disappeared into the gathering crowd. Kira looked out over the sea of people for a familiar face and found herself staring at Conner and Ethan. Deep in conversation, they barley noticed when their teacher stalked into the room and strode purposefully over to their table, with_ that_ look on his face. Smiling, she gently strummed her guitar and began to sing, never taking her eyes from the heated argument that was taking place in the back. _What has Conner done now,_ she wondered as the crowd suddenly broke into boisterous applause. Realizing that she had finished her song, she moved from the stage and pushed her way through the crowd to her friends table, just in time to catch the end of the argument.

"No," said Tommy heatedly. "I don't care if it was an accident or not, and I really don't see how something like that could be!"

"But Dr. O, I told you, Frank had never done anything like that before!"

Tommy shook his head and leveled a threatening finger at Conner. "You are going to call him and apologize."

The jock started to protest, "But I didn't…"

"No!" Tommy threw up his hand. "You. Are. Going. To. Apologize. To. Him."

Kira couldn't stand it any longer. She leaned over to Ethan and whispered in his ear, "What are they talking about?"

"Well, do you remember that last mission they went on? The one to Silver Hills?"

Kira nodded and rolled her eyes at the memory. It had been the only thing Conner had talked about for a week after his return; he really thought he was something getting to work with "the legends" as he called them.

"What about it?"

"Well, apparently there was a little 'incident'."

"Oh? Surely not with Conner along," she said sarcastically.

Ethan grinned but offered no further information. "Here, read this, maybe it'll help."

He handed her the next part of Tommy list. She took it and with a confused glance at her teacher, began to read.

161. If I build something, I expect you to APRECIATE IT! (Lots of love, Billy)

162. You may think you're a badass, but you're not. So quit making yourself seem like it. (Lucas!!)

163. If you're wandering through the forest make sure there aren't any sinkholes around…

164. Cole, the 'I WAS raised by animals' excuse will only work so many times! (Either give it a rest or learn some table manners)

165. "Meet my little friend' is such a cliché phrase; refrain from using it when pulling out a really big weapon. (Seriously, the monsters are starting to laugh at us.)

166. When a certain Red Rangers show boats...remind him that a certain red ranger saved his head from being trapped inside a pumpkin!...( Jason)

167. **Don't** take your magic for granted! (It's not for conjuring up pizza!)

168. Just because your teammate is a little strange doesn't mean they aren't right (Just ask Chip and Bridge)

169. Don't leave pictures of a guy kissing you on the cheek lying around. Your 'dead' fiancée may show up and he **will** be pissed.

170. Yes, the brooding rangers do have hearts. Just because they aren't as bubbly as you are doesn't mean they don't have feelings. (When you get to know him, Eric is really sweet.)

171. Ghostbusters will not be there to help, so just get on with it!

172. You are **NOT** superman, so stop looking for a phonebox and trying to extend your cape!

173. Younger male rangers stop hitting on EVERY female ranger, they WILL hurt you and the guys who secretly love them will exact revenge. (Conner stop trying to flirt with Maddie...Nick looks like he's about to burn a hole through your head.)

174. People do occasionally get injured in the line of duty, but don't worry, no one has ever died….…not permanently at least.

175. The zords and bikes are colored coded so don't show the world your stupidity by asking which one is yours. (Ahem, Conner)

176. Evil doesn't sleep…so you can't either…

177. Rangers, you are not allowed to have a Myspace! (Do I really need to explain the ramifications that this can have?!?)

178. I don't care how 'beautiful' that women is, when I call for help I mean now, not when you can tear yourself away from her. (FYI, she's a monster in disguise anyway, how sad is that? Can't even get a real girl to go out with you…)

179. There is no 'Ranger Hall of Fame' so stop trying to out do your predecessors. If they didn't make it, neither will you.

180. When going on a secret ranger mission, leave your pets at home!! (Frank, the family cat, "snuck" into Conner book bag during at trip to Bio Lab. They arrived on a Friday. When they left on Sunday, Eric's bird was MIA…)

Kira's mouth fell open as she reread the last rule. "No way!"

"Oh, yes way," said Ethan with an evil smirk. "All they ever found was a broken feather. My guess is that Frank the cat had a little midnight snack in Silver Hills."

"That's horrible," said Kira, glancing at Conner and Tommy.

"Yeah, course the bird could have just as easily escaped and flew away."

"I can see that now," replied Kira sarcastically, "the bird just opens the cage door and flies away into the sunset."

"Or someone let it go; it wouldn't be the first time. Either way, Dr. O seems to think Frank is the culprit. "

Kira let out a derisive snort, "have you ever seen frank?"

"No, why?"

"Just picture Garfield, only as a Siamese and fatter. He's too lazy to walk to his own food bowl, what makes them think he would go prowling around looking for a snack?"

Ethan shrugged, and then grinned as the argument took a tragic turn. In his attempt to defend Frank's honor, Conner leapt to his feet and knocked over his glass of coke.

Kira closed her eyes as the glass crashed to the floor and landed on Tommy's inadequately protected foot. He let out a low growl as Conner backed slowly away.

"I, uh, I'm going to go call Eric now," he said hurriedly, stepping far out of Tommy's reach. "And I think I need to go home and feed Frank, he gets testy when he doesn't get feed on schedule…."

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A/N Ok, so one more chapter to go...any special suggestions you want to see? If so, you know what to do...make me smile...lots of love, you guys rock! And no, I haven't forgotten about the mysterious rule #6. :-) 


	11. Chapter 11

Kimberly sat across the table from Tommy and silently reflected on the past three weeks. She could barley see the thin white scar that ran above his right eye and the ink from the permanent marker had almost completely faded away, but his pride was still wounded.

"Tommy I really don't think this is a good idea," she said quietly so that the others wouldn't hear. With Conner involved she knew that this was going to end badly, and most likely with another trip to the emergency room.

Her husband turned to her with that look in his eyes, the one that was supposed to say 'I have to prove I'm a man', but Kimberly read it as 'I'm really not as stupid as I look.' She sighed as she watched him stand and walk over to the mat and his waiting pupil.

_Might as well enjoy the show_, she thought as she settled into her chair.

"Alright Conner," said Tommy bowing and taking an imposing stance, "lets try this one more time."

Conner scratched his head and looked to his friends for help, but they just smiled casually back at him.

"Dr. O, I think we all know how good you are…I just…let's just say you won by default ok? I mean, I hit you in the head with a metal pole, you really didn't have a chance after that."

"No Conner, we're gonna see who's the better fighter once and for all."

Conner shrugged, "whatever you say…"

It didn't take Kimberly long to get bored of the fight in front of her as it was painfully obvious that Tommy had years worth of experience over his student. She even felt kinda bad for Conner, after all that last punch sounded like it hurt. Wearily, she picked up the last page of Tommy list to occupy her thoughts as the boys played on the mat, trying desperately to one up the other.

_Talk about one big ego trip,_ she thought dryly, _men!_

181. If you've got a tattoo on your back that is going to eventually kill you, you shouldn't use it to get sympathy from the cute girls at the base (Ryan, we all know you tried that line on Miss Fairweather)

182. If gaining your powers from an Alien who will take them back eventually, it pays to check the warranty on them in case they fail (Trey, Jason's still after your hide)

183. No, Time Traveling does not earn you frequent flyer miles (Cam!!)

184. Billy we all know you think morphinamonal is a cool word but, seriously, the new kids are starting to laugh at us.

185. iPods are a no-no. Just leave them in the car; you do not need music to help you.

186. If you're on vacation, stay alert!! Don't be hitting on random girls when the villain shows up! (Hunter...)

187. The Q-Rex will not eat the Dragonzord for breakfast, mainly because the Dragonzords at the bottom of the ocean and Tommy will kick your butt to Aquitar and back (Not looking at any one -Eric-)

188. If you think regular people are nuts, wait till you meet former Rangers... (Joel, even though you married her, you still gave her the creeps for a while.)

189. Don't say you're a power ranger as an excuse to why you keep disappearing or at all for that matter, I don't care if 'the truth is always hardest to believe' someone will eventually put the pieces together (Chip!)

190. Just because you've held different powers with different colors over the years, does not mean you can go around calling yourself the Technicolor Ranger - (And yes Tommy, we all watched your diary)

191. Communicators are not like phones: Do NOT call them if you lose them, you don't know who'll pick it up.

192. While team ups are common, and really a lot of fun, they are serious matters (remember the 'dead/destroyed' villain trying to KILL you?).

193. If a girl hits on you repeatedly, chances are she works for the other side. (Ahem, Nick)

194. Don't die! I don't care how many times the older rangers do it, you are not to stop breathing!

195. If a monster turns up as your teaching some cadets how to fight, make sure you check the cadets out first in case one's a cyborg that wants to be a ranger (Yes Bridge, it is okay to use your powers to make sure someone is who they say they are.)

196. Its not called showing off, it's called being mad because you can't do it! (Seriously Jason, leave the newbies alone!)

197. Never suggest something as a joke when it comes to rangering. (Remember the time loop?)

198. Okay, he's been evil, through four different colors, you've been through hell and high water with him, you're gonna end up together! (Tommy and Kim!)

199. We only defend the cities/areas we live in, don't expect us to fly to Korea just to save you!

200. And always remember: Once a Ranger, always a Ranger... no matter how much you try to avoid it.

Kim grinned as she read the last sentence but her amusement was short lived as a cry of pain reached her ears. She let the paper drop to her lap and saw Tommy curled up on the floor, Conner and Kira standing over him.

"Conner," said Kira, slapping at his arm, "you did it again!"

"What! No, he moved!"

Kira gave a disgusted scoffing sound as she leaned over to help her teacher sit up. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah, I'm great," he said, lying through his teeth. "Kim, I think I need Band-Aid…"

"I think you need more than a Band-Aid," she said getting up and walking to the cabinet on the wall.

"It's just a scratch," said Tommy. He refused to let his pride be damaged any more by a small scratch and a couple of bruises.

"Here," said Kim as she peeled the plastic off the Band-Aid and handed it to Tommy.

"I cannot believe you Conner," said Kira trying her best to stare the red ranger down.

"It was an accident!"

"You seem to be very accident prone lately. I hope it's not contagious!"

Kim glared at the younger rangers and succeeded in silencing their bickering. "You two sound like an old married couple!"

"No, their worse than that," cut in Tommy as he grabbed Kim's hand and pulled himself painfully to his feet. "I really should listen to my own advice," he said under his breath as the two teenagers glared silently at one another, daring the other to be the one to blink first.

"What's that Oliver," asked Kimberly suspiciously.

"Nothing."

"Oh no, you've peeked my curiosity now, you'd better tell me what you mean."

Tommy smiled as he headed for the door, "I was just thinking about rule number six, that's all."

"And what would that be," Kim called after him, needing to know once and for all what had been smeared across his face the last few weeks.

Tommy threw a glare in Conner's direction before continuing up the stairs, pausing long enough to answer Kimberly's burning question.

"If you're going to take on your own red ranger, make sure you didn't teach him everything you know, chances are he'll end up handing you your own ass."

Kim smirked as Tommy disappeared, "that's just sad Oliver!"

FIN

* * *

Well there you go. I hope you guys enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it! Thanks to everyone who offered suggestions, you guys ROCK! ...see that little purpleish button...make me smile. :) 


	12. Chapter 12

Rangers Code of Practice: Rules to Live By 

1. If you have no idea what the smart guy is saying, just smile and nod your head. Things will be far less awkward if you play along. (I speak from experience…sorry Billy)

2. There is_ always _another option, just because you don't want to do it, doesn't mean it isn't there.

3. It says 'do not touch' for a reason.

4. If you have a phobia it is best to keep it to yourself, otherwise you will be taunted mercilessly by your peers. (No Conner, you don't have to go swinging with Ethan)

5. If you see a rabid fangirl, run like hell. (Just ask Andros and TJ. Which bring up another point, if you are forced to reveal your identify, it is always a good a idea to pick up a change of address form in the process.)

6. If you're going to take on your own red ranger, make sure you didn't teach him everything you know, chances are he'll end up handing you your own ass.

7. When going on a secret mission with the other red rangers, make sure you have a place to hide for a few days when the girls find out.

8. **Always **make sure you carry an extra alarm for the mega ship, otherwise you might forget where you parked it. (The other rangers may make fun of you for this, but at least you won't have to listen to your girlfriend nag when you forget where the ship is.)

9. No, you don't need a license to drive a zord, but that doesn't mean they are big toys. (Justin!)

10. Time travel is a definite no-no unless accompanied by a professional. (Sorry Wes, but you still don't get a fan club for this.)

11. No, you cannot kill a fellow ranger no matter how much they annoy you. (Kira put the baseball bat down and step away from Conner!)

12. Stop making fun of the older rangers, you **will **regret it.

13. Plan A never works, plan B rarely works, plan C is almost always your best bet.

14. "What's the worst that could happen" and "It can't get any worse" are two phrases that are never to be uttered.

15. Make someone smile; buy them a stick of butter for Christmas.

16. Red and pink are two colors that work really well together, as do red and yellow… (Do with that what you will….) innocent whistle

17. If at first you don't succeed, run like hell.

18. Newbie's should **always **listen to their elders; we know what we are talking about when we tell you **not **to do something.

19. Note to self: learn to land on your feet.

20. If it looks like a dog and barks like a dog, chances are it's an evil monster trying to kill you.

21. When approaching and evil villain, make sure that your backup will actually back you up. (It was only once! – Billy)

22. Think before you act. There is a** very** fine line between heroic and stupid.

23. Always think to ask the new red ranger from outer space if he has someone lying around in a cyro chamber.

24. Don't poke people and say 'you're human!' It just annoys them. (Have you ever seen Andros annoyed? Not a pretty sight.)

25. Never, EVER, mess with a pink ranger and her hair. (Two words: Death wish!)

26. Never dis the tech guy; you never know when he might save your life. (Just ask Cam.)

27. Witty comebacks are an absolute must for a red ranger, but you must let the others get a few in occasionally, keeps team moral at a good level.

28. Evil rangers rarely stay that way… (How could you **not** know that by now?)

29. Who says fan clubs are a good thing? They're full of obsessed psychos who make you yearn for baddies you use to fight. (Cheer up Wes!)

30. Its not called hero worship, its call being a stalker. (Quit it! You're really starting to freak Tommy out.)

31. The dumbest, most harmless looking monster will be the one who comes the closest to killing you.

32. If somebody yells 'look out' it's already too late.

33. "Another One Bites the Dust" is **not** our theme song! (Stop it Jason!)

34. Don't tease the brainiacs, they are **way smarter** than you are and payback **will** be hell.

35. No, you cannot use the force! (Who do you think you are? Obi-wan Kenobi?)

36. Guys, you may outnumber the females on your team, but you will **never** win!

37. There will always be a love connection between two people on a ranger team. Some of you just don't know how to do anything about it. coughColeAlyssacough

38. If a ranger laughs kinda like this 'Muahahahahhahaha' assume they are evil and are going to try and kill you. (Right Tommy?)

39. Teleporting is a privilege not a right. We **will** make you walk if necessary.

40. After blowing up a monster, don't bother to celebrate…the bad guys almost always make it grow. (And please keep your victory dances to yourselves, nobody really want to see that!)

41. Once in a while there are always civilians who are **constantly** trying to find out your identities, just distract them with a 50 shopping spree. (It usually works with Cassidy)

42. Girls make sure to let the guys think they're in charge...it boosts their egos... (Not that they **need** to be any bigger)

43. Rangers don't wear spandex; it just looks like we do! (Seriously, stop making fun of us!)

44. You do **NOT**, and I repeat, you do **NOT **get theme songs! ("Can't Touch This" is forthwith banned from all of your CD players!)

45. "It seemed like a good idea at the time" is not a valid argument.

46. Be nice to the smart guys on the team, they can make it look like an accident.

47. When a giant robot T-Rex is chasing you, locking the door to your jeep isn't gonna save your ass. (Right Tommy?)

48. During your Ranger career, expect one of these will happen to you: either you will be (a), sent to a different planet, (b), sent to a different time period, or (c), sent to another dimension.

49. Thunder and Lightning are not play toys (Hunter, Blake!)

50. Never go on a date with your best friend's sister/brother (Zhane you should know better by now. Really, it's a disaster waiting to happen. Don't. Do. It.)

51. If someone yells "DUCK", they don't mean a yellow feathered bird that quacks.

52. Motocross **IS** better than Skateboarding (Get over it Shane)

53. If your electronic device gets a virus, assume that it may be evil and will try and kill you.

54. Just because you get a cape on your uniform, it doesn't mean that you have to act like superman! (Chip! Stop! You're embarrassing us!)

55. Do **not **use your teammates as 'monster bait'. (It's not funny, especially when you get the hospital bill back.)

56. Just because they're an air-head, it doesn't mean they aren't really smart. (Right Dustin?)

57. The guy with the glasses is normally the one you really, really don't want to mess with, remember, geeks will inherit the earth. (Just ask Billy.)

58. Most, but not all of the time, the pink Ranger is the hottest female on the team. (Pinky, get used to the guys on the team looking at your spandexed rear...it's not like you never looked at the guys while they were morphed).

59. **NEVER, EVER** just assume something about a fellow ranger or monster…you do know what assuming will do to you right? (If not, break the word down into three comprehensible parts….)

60.** Stop** stalking the older rangers! (It's creepy and annoying. Do you really want to have to pay for their therapy bills Cole?)

61. Be nice to the technicians for your team. More often then not they hold the keys to your zords and your life.

62. Red rangers stop playing the "reluctant rookie" you know you want to be a power ranger more than anyone else on your team.

63. Yes we all know the dangers, but could you not put safety locks on blasters!

64. Just because you** think** all that posing looks cool doesn't mean it actually is...

65. Yes the pretty Evil Space Ninja tricked you, but that does not mean you shouldn't give up! (Cheer up Dustin! I saw the look Marah was giving you -Winks-)

66. When you appoint a new blue ranger, make sure that he knows what he's doing! (And please stop teasing Rocky!)

67. Smile, it makes people wonder what you are up too.

68. Newbie rangers have to wash **All** of the zords. (Yes, we realize they are gigantic. No, we really don't care.)

69. If it can go wrong it will go wrong. (Make sure you have a plan b, not just plan a recycled. See rule 13 for more info.)

70. Jocks, be nice to the geeks, they are the ones who help you with school, mess with them and that five page term paper goes 'poof!' gone.

71. It's okay to hide behind the camera, it got a certain Red Ranger to notice you. (Cheer up Maddie!)

72. Always make sure your disguise is fool proof when you go to Onyx, hiding your morpher is the first step (Andros)

73. Because you're the genius, it gives you the right to be the sarcastic and/or confusing one. (Cam!)

74. Just because you have the power of invisibility, it does** not** give you the right to eavesdrop on other peoples conversations! (Tommy!)

75. Stop arguing about sports! (I don't care if motocross is better than skate boarding or if soccer is better than football!)

76. If a group of mutated turtle's shows up when you're getting your butts kicked, do not assume it was only a coincidence.

77. Don't put pictures of yourself morphed in your diary and leave it lying around. People will steal it and read it. (Cassie! The whole idea of a secret identity is to keep it a **SECRET**!)

78. Super computers are not for playing games on. (Shane!)

79. 'No, my powers can only be use for good' is not a phrase you should use lightly. (It will come back to bite you in the ass.)

80. If there's six of you, and only five powers, Russian roulette is not the solution.

81. Never ask us why we always start our battles unmorphed or fight with our bare hands first before combining our weapons. That's just the way it is, OK!

82. Unless you're the Red Ranger, you can stop fantasizing about getting unique weapons/gadgets, unless your color is a variant shade of Red. (And no, that does **NOT** include Pink.)

83. If you don't like your Ranger color, too bad. Just be glad the suits don't have underwear on the outside.

84. When blasted into the air, find something more creative to say than "WHOA!"

85. Be nice to the newbie's, chances are they'll end up as your leader. (But by all means make them polish things)

86. **Stop** traveling through time! Do you know how much trouble this causes? (I know most of us have done it at least once, but believe me it's only fun the first time! But if you insist on doing it anyway, do not eat lunch first…)

87. Sky, your theme is not "Bringing sexy back", stop listening to music whilst on the beat now that you are red ranger.

88. If your teammate is captured and brainwashed, do **not **demorph in the middle of enemy territory. (Ahem, Jason…)

89. Ignore the big blue dog, he'll fight with you then erase your memory afterwards... Did that big blue dog just talk?

90. Okay, stop dancing around each other! You both like each other, everyone around you knows you like each other. Enough! Wes ask Jen out or we will do it for you! How does being locked in a supply closet sound?

91. Every team has a brooding one, goofy one, genius, tough guy, at least one girl, sometimes two girls, drowning in testosterone, and very rarely, siblings.

92. Running does **NOT** make you a coward; sometimes it makes you the smartest person on your team. (Ha! Take that Billy!)

93. If you have a bad memory, ask the tech guy to build something to help you record what you need to do that day…assuming you remember to use it.

94. If your invention causes you to switch bodies with a Ranger of the opposite sex, make sure any blabbermouths on the team don't know about it, or you'll never hear the end of it.

95. Male rangers if you piss a female ranger off...it was nice knowing you. (Who would be that stupid anyway?)

96. When on a Red Ranger mission, if one of the older ones says something cool to the villains, make sure you either say something just as cool, or keep your mouth shut, rookie.

97. We have doors for a reason… (No they aren't to slam people's faces into Adam.)

98. Never get involved in a 'who's the better red colored ranger' fight with your team mate (Hunter & Shane!)

99. If your 'dead fiancée' shows up one day out of the blue, don't just assume it's a coincidence.

100. Yes opposites attract, but you don't want them colliding and one killing the other. (Vida go back to the turn tables but give Xander his head back!)

101. Okay, leave Adam alone, his spirit animal could've been a lot worse, like a llama. Besides, some frogs eat beetles if you know what I mean.

102. A cocky ranger will normally be put into their place...

103. The phrase 'Do you believe in magic?' is only cool once. Let's keep it that way. (Nick!)

104. Always remember, the guy that's training you, he's been there, done that, he's not impressed by your showing off (ring any bells Red Rangers?)

105. The new guy (or guys) in town are usually the evil rangers, even if they are nice (Especially if they are nice…)

106. If you get caught spying on your teammate, just walk away and whistle innocently like nothing happened. (It worked for Lucas.)

107. If you're from a different country than America, make sure you use every single stereotype you can think of about your country, just to confuse the heck out of the others (Kat, Xander)

108. Yellow does occasionally look okay on a guy (Chip….)

109. Never make fun of anybody's size...it will be your downfall!

110. Does it really surprise you that we're a TV show?

111. All Rangers should at least try to keep relationships within the group, it's a lot less explaining when you have to dash off during an attack than coming back to a pissed off date. (Zack knows all about this one.)

112. "I didn't know she was your sister," is not a valid excuse Zhane!

113. You shouldn't mock your fellow teammates, especially after you have been caught eavesdropping. They will hurt you when they finally catch you. (Yeah, you have to sleep sometime Katie, Trip.)

114. Don't refuse to watch Japanese TV shows because you think they are making fun of you, they **aren't**; besides they are an excellent way to pass your history class. (Just ask Conner, he got a B on his paper.)

115. Its never a good idea to tell the bad guys that you want to be evil again, chances are you will get your wish.

116. If you **HAVE** to pass your powers onto someone, make sure it's not some annoying little kid, no matter **HOW** smart he is.

117. Yes, you can pull the sword out of the stone.** No**, it does** not** make you king!

118. If a big bird is flying around, chances are it'll attack you. No, it is not the one from Sesame Street!

119. Liking a fellow ranger of the same gender is okay; just make sure he/she isn't taken first.

120. Yes, Tommy's Native American, but no, his "Ut, seet, aiyaa!" is **NOT** some Native American phrase or secret code.

121. So what if she's a big pop star diva? You have the real talent! (Cheer up Kira, you'll make it!)

122. When making a SECRET video about your life as a power ranger please make sure you put it AWAY after you finish editing it. (Right Tommy?)

123. Its not the fall that kills you it's whoever lands on top of you.

124. Ethan, give Conner his soccer ball back, he's beginning to freak out.

125. Note: Although the term "You break it you bought it" does not apply when in a giant robot battle, try to destroy as little public property as you can, taxes are high enough already!

126. Ok, green may not be the best color, but at least I have a blaster and less responsibility.

127. His dumbass, girl chasing bravado is really a cover-up; yes he really likes you if you'd give him a chance. (Kira and Conner!)

128. I am not Luke and you are not my father! (You people just think you're so funny don't you?)

129. If you're really curious about how big the fan base is, check out fanfiction sites. (-Innocent whistle-)

130. Do not argue with your talking, enchanted saber during a zord battle. You'll just get your ass kicked.

131. If you're undercover at a villains' meeting, just drink the damn lava juice! (Andros!)

132. "Kamehameha" and "Big Bang Attack" are not phrases to be use when firing a blaster! (Anime marathons are now banned before battles!)

133. Do **NOT** give Conner shiny objects, he's distracted enough already!

134. Don't be rude to the Ninjetti master with the "Mighty Mouse" voice, especially when you need new powers.

135. Make sure to ask your mentor if there's someone even stronger than the current villain you're fighting on their way (thanks for no warning about Zedd, Zordon!)

136. We are not wimps, but if we have flu we reserve the right to sleep for a few days.

137. Don't play with your trading cards at school, chances are the evil principle will confiscate them and use them against you! (ETHAN!)

138. The answer to an arrogant green ranger is not "sick 'em Cujo!" (Joel had to have thirty stitches in his leg…)

139. If the monsters are suddenly good and the Power Rangers are evil then you've just landed into your own personal Alternate Universe! (Tori...)

140. Rare and exotic plants do not make good gifts, especially when the bad guys get their hands on them… (Kimberly still doesn't like to talk about 'the plant episode' from high school.)

141. Its not your fault that you were turning into a bug, just say the after effects of time travel threw you off, it's believable. (Cam!)

142. If someone on your team has been in the Air Force **DO NOT PISS HER OFF**!! There's probably three different ways she could stun your ass before you knew what was going on.

143. Ethan quit tapping into NASA's satellite system; they **can** trace it back to you no matter how careful you are.

144. An example to learn from...being put under any spell...can bring out a side of you that really** wasn't** mean for everyone to see! (-Innocent Smile- Billy's underwear….)

145. **Stop** making Wizard of Oz references about Zordon. (There are no curtains in the command center Justin!)

146. There's nothing wrong with teaching generations of children to put a mask on, run around in spandex and attack ugly people! **Is there?**

147. Stop with the innocent whistling, bushes **do not** whistle!

148. Yes Trent, you are the white ranger. But there's **never** gonna be a 'Forever White' mission.

149. The word is **TEAMWORK**, not ten copies of myself. (Repeat after me, "There is not I in team")

150. If you give us a bad name, we **WILL** go off into space and leave you behind. (…wonder who that could be…)

151. Xander quit playing "Pink" by Aerosmith, Vida's eye is starting to do that twitching thing.

152. Just because you do spend an **inordinate** amount of time at someone's house, that does not give you permission to leave your car there... (CONNER!)

153. Do **NOT** let Shane have sugar; he's like Twitchy after having coffee.

154. Being baked into a pizza doesn't get you a fan club. (Sorry TJ)

155. Just because you are a power ranger doesn't mean you can wear your color all the time...someone's bound to notice color coded kids that disappear when the rangers show up.

161. If I build something, I expect you to APRECIATE IT! (Lots of love, Billy)

162. You may think you're a badass, but you're not. So quit making yourself seem like it. (Lucas!!)

163. If you're wandering through the forest make sure there aren't any sinkholes around…

164. Cole, the 'I WAS raised by animals' excuse will only work so many times! (Either give it a rest or learn some table manners)

165. "Meet my little friend' is such a cliché phrase; refrain from using it when pulling out a really big weapon. (Seriously, the monsters are starting to laugh at us.)

166. When a certain Red Rangers show boats...remind him that a certain red ranger saved his head from being trapped inside a pumpkin!...( Jason)

167. **Don't** take your magic for granted! (It's not for conjuring up pizza!)

168. Just because your teammate is a little strange doesn't mean they aren't right (Just ask Chip and Bridge)

169. Don't leave pictures of a guy kissing you on the cheek lying around. Your 'dead' fiancée may show up and he **will** be pissed.

170. Yes, the brooding rangers do have hearts. Just because they aren't as bubbly as you are doesn't mean they don't have feelings. (When you get to know him, Eric is really sweet.)

171. Ghostbusters will not be there to help, so just get on with it!

172. You are **NOT** superman, so stop looking for a phonebox and trying to extend your cape!

173. Younger male rangers stop hitting on EVERY female ranger, they WILL hurt you and the guys who secretly love them will exact revenge. (Conner stop trying to flirt with Maddie...Nick looks like he's about to burn a hole through your head.)

174. People do occasionally get injured in the line of duty, but don't worry, no one has ever died….…not permanently at least.

175. The zords and bikes are colored coded so don't show the world your stupidity by asking which one is yours. (Ahem, Conner)

176. Evil doesn't sleep…so you can't either…

177. Rangers, you are not allowed to have a Myspace! (Do I really need to explain the ramifications that this can have?!?)

178. I don't care how 'beautiful' that women is, when I call for help I mean now, not when you can tear yourself away from her. (FYI, she's a monster in disguise anyway, how sad is that? Can't even get a real girl to go out with you…)

179. There is no 'Ranger Hall of Fame' so stop trying to out do your predecessors. If they didn't make it, neither will you.

180. When going on a secret ranger mission, leave your pets at home!! (Frank, the family cat, "snuck" into Conner book bag during at trip to Bio Lab. They arrived on a Friday. When they left on Sunday, Eric's bird was MIA…)

181. If you've got a tattoo on your back that is going to eventually kill you, you shouldn't use it to get sympathy from the cute girls at the base (Ryan, we all know you tried that line on Miss Fairweather)

182. If gaining your powers from an Alien who will take them back eventually, it pays to check the warranty on them in case they fail (Trey, Jason's still after your hide)

183. No, Time Traveling does not earn you frequent flyer miles (Cam!!)

184. Billy we all know you think morphinamonal is a cool word but, seriously, the new kids are starting to laugh at us.

185. iPods are a no-no. Just leave them in the car; you do not need music to help you.

186. If you're on vacation, stay alert!! Don't be hitting on random girls when the villain shows up! (Hunter...)

187. The Q-Rex will not eat the Dragonzord for breakfast, mainly because the Dragonzords at the bottom of the ocean and Tommy will kick your butt to Aquitar and back (Not looking at any one -Eric-)

188. If you think regular people are nuts, wait till you meet former Rangers... (Joel, even though you married her, you still gave her the creeps for a while.)

189. Don't say you're a power ranger as an excuse to why you keep disappearing or at all for that matter, I don't care if 'the truth is always hardest to believe' someone will eventually put the pieces together (Chip!)

190. Just because you've held different powers with different colors over the years, does not mean you can go around calling yourself the Technicolor Ranger - (And yes Tommy, we all watched your diary)

191. Communicators are not like phones: Do NOT call them if you lose them, you don't know who'll pick it up.

192. While team ups are common, and really a lot of fun, they are serious matters (remember the 'dead/destroyed' villain trying to KILL you?).

193. If a girl hits on you repeatedly, chances are she works for the other side. (Ahem, Nick)

194. Don't die! I don't care how many times the older rangers do it, you are not to stop breathing!

195. If a monster turns up as your teaching some cadets how to fight, make sure you check the cadets out first in case one's a cyborg that wants to be a ranger (Yes Bridge, it is okay to use your powers to make sure someone is who they say they are.)

196. Its not called showing off, it's called being mad because you can't do it! (Seriously Jason, leave the newbies alone!)

197. Never suggest something as a joke when it comes to rangering. (Remember the time loop?)

198. Okay, he's been evil, through four different colors, you've been through hell and high water with him, you're gonna end up together! (Tommy and Kim!)

199. We only defend the cities/areas we live in, don't expect us to fly to Korea just to save you!

200. And always remember: Once a Ranger, always a Ranger... no matter how much you try to avoid it.


End file.
